Death, bereavement and loss
Death, bereavement and loss are natural life events – they happen to all of us. We think we should be able to cope but loss can be frightening and disturbing as well as very painful.
It is not unusual to feel very isolated and alone with your grief even if you have family and friends to support you. Those closest to you can feel helpless or even embarrassed and may try to avoid the painful feelings by keeping quiet or staying away.
At times the intensity of your thoughts and feelings can surprise you when you are dealing with, potentially, some of the most painful feelings you may have ever had – shock, disbelief, panic, anger, guilt, bitterness, hopelessness, abandonment, relief, sadness, despair.
You may not be able to focus on little else but your loved one’s death, have persistent pining or longing for the deceased person, have thoughts of guilt or self-blame, believe that you did something wrong or could have prevented the death, feel as if life is not worth living, have lost your sense of purpose in life, wish you had died along with your loved one.
A more recent loss can bring back the pain of earlier bereavements or losses you may have experienced in the past.
These are normal responses and you can experience different feelings at the same time, which may leave you feeling overwhelmed and confused by the complexity of your emotions. Loss can be very complicated. Everyone experiences grief differently and there is no ‘normal’ or ‘right’ way to grieve.
It takes time to work through our feelings.
In therapy we create an environment in which the bereaved people can be themselves and show their feelings, rather than having to put on a front. We provide a safe and containing place where you will be heard.
Therapy can help people reach a more peaceful place of acceptance of their loss so they can gradually move forward in their lives. The loss becomes an important part of life rather than its centre.